Many people who are in a long-term relationship will someday question themselves whether this woman really the one I want to spend the rest of my life with.
The complicated issues about love and relationships are researching by scientists all over the world. The way people fit together and what qualities they need to bring into a relationship to make it a happy and lasting one are the issues they spent thousands of hours trying to figure out.
Here are the most important results of these studies. If a woman has these 14 qualities and behaviors, you have found the right one.
- She is smarter than you
You should find a partner who is smarter than you. The professor emeritus of the University of Aberdeen, Lawrence Whalley, has been researching dementia for a long time and he found that a smart woman can protect you from dementia later in life. His advice: “The thing a boy is never told he needs to do if he wants to live a longer life — but what he should do — is marry an intelligent woman. There is no better buffer than intelligence.”
A smart woman will never stop challenging you intellectually and keep your mental faculties keen.
- She is honest
We all make mistakes as we all are not perfect. So, have someone who advice you when you are wrong and gets you back o track. According to studies, men who seek for a long term committed relationship want to have an honest partner. Never let her go away from you if you have found someone like that.
- She has a positive outlook
You might have found the right partner if your girlfriend always sees the glass as half full or sometimes even accuse her of naïve optimism. Negative people are toxin and bad for our health in the long run, think it as this way.
According to a research paper by the psychologist Elaine Hatfield, when we spend time with people, we tend to take their negativity. And this internalized negativity can lead to increased heartrate, it impedes our digestion and lowers our concentration.
- She compromises
We all cannot be right at some point in life and you and your partner will disagree at some point in your relationship. This is a normal thing that happens to everybody. But, if the both partners are ready to compromise, the relationship can truly work.
According to a study done by Psychologists of the UCLA with 172 married couples for 11 years and found that: “It’s easy to be committed to your relationship when it’s going well,” said senior study author Thomas Bradbury.”As a relationship changes, however, shouldn’t you say at some point something like, ‘I’m committed to this relationship, but it’s not going very well — I need to have some resolve, make some sacrifices and take the steps I need to take to keep this relationship moving forward.”
If someone is willing to take steps and make sacrifices they can have a happy and long term relationship.
- She laughs at your jokes
If we have someone who actually laughs at our jokes it’s really funny. According to a study by psychologists of Westfield State University in 2006, having a partner who thinks they are funny is more important for men than for women. You have found the best partner if you have already found a woman you can laugh with.
- She has an open heart
Your life will be a lot easier if your partner shines in the public spotlight and can easily make her heard in a group.
According to a study done by the University of Westminster, people who are open hearted and share personal information are seen as especially attractive. The people who are open hearted are judged as more handsome or beautiful.
- She supports your goals and pursues her own
Some scientists have tried to prove that men prefer to marry weak women. But, Christine C. Whelan breaks this myth with statistics in her book “why smart men marry smart women” , that successful, well educated and high earning women do not marry less often than others.
If your partner is well educated, she will motivate you and will not depend on you. She won’t need your constant validation and you don’t need to worry about her.
According to a study of the University of British Columbia, a weak person often tends to forget his or her own goals and these people don’t just prioritize the goals of their partners, they tend to co-opt them completely. So, have goals you pursue together.
- She has a good relationship with her parents
Just look at their parents if you like to see your partner in 30 years. This way you will know how they will treat you in 30 years.
According to a research done in the University of Alberta, questioning 2970 people of all ages there’s a clear correlation between the relationship to the parents in their teen years and their love life later on.
The relationship between her and her parents doesn’t need to be always perfect. The author Matt Johnson writes that, “Understanding your contribution to the relationship with your parents would be important to recognizing any tendency to replicate behavior — positive or negative — in an intimate relationship”. Be aware of those behaviors to learn how to do better in other relationships.
- She is kind
According to the science kindness and generosity is the key to a long term relationship. According to the researches on married couples over four decades ago done by the psychologist John Gottmann of the University of Washington, there are two kinds of couples: Masters and Disasters. The disasters, you guessed it, break it off in the first six years of the relationship. But the masters stay together for a long time and always have this one thing in common: “They are scanning social environment for things they can appreciate and say thank you for. They are building this culture of respect and appreciation very purposefully,” he said in an interview with the “Atlantic”.
- She remains calm in fights and calms you down too
In every relationship there are fights. Never disagreeing is not a sign of a stable relationship. How you deal with disagreements and how you make up again later is the most important think in a relationship.
According to the study done by researchers of the University of California Berkeley and Northwest University including 80 couples for 13 years, a relationship will last long if a woman can calm herself during a fight ad calm the man too. But the affect will change if the man is the one to calm down first.
- She does foolish things with you
Never let her go away if you found a woman who does not hold it against you if you stayed out too long partying.
According to a study of the University of Michigan done with 4864 married individuals, the happiest couples where those who drank alcohol together. But this doesn’t mean that alcoholics are happier partners. Kira Birditt, the author of the study says that, “It could be that couples that do more leisure time activities together have better marital quality.”
- She has a life of her own
Rather than a good sex life, having your own space and privacy is more important in a relationship. According to a study of the University of Michigan, “when individuals have their own friends, their own set of interests, when they are able to define themselves not by their spouse or relationship, that makes them happier and less bored,” Terry Orbuch, author of the study, said in an interview with the “Wall Street Journal”.
- She accepts your flaws
In many relationships one partner criticize the other with their ugly pants, their bad jokes and their annoying habit of chewing too loudly.
You should never let go a woman who just accept you. The psychologist Terry Orbuch said in her column for the “Huffington Post” that, “an optimistic approach will rub off on you and attract you to others who are seeing the world as half full.”
- She does not bear grudges
Of you have a woman who can forgive others, don’t let her go away. The people who can unconditionally forgive others live longer lives said a study by researchers of the Luther College, the Duke University, and the Harvard Divinity School.
The most important fact is that forgiveness is the foundation of a healthy relationship. No one is perfect in this world and there is some situation you inadvertently do something that hurts your partner and you will need her to be able to forgive you.
Never let her go and take care of her if you’ve found someone who possess these qualities. You’ll have a better life with her.